Decisive. Empowered. Resilient.

Learning to Let Go

Learning to Let Go

In every workshop of mine, one of the first things we cover is that the #1 reason why people are not successful is because they are not ready to learn, grow and change! There are two reasons why people don’t learn, grow and change. #1 is because they think they don’t have to and yet can still receive the results they want in life or #2 they simply will not let go!

Since you are reading this you already realize that if you want something you don’t currently have, then something in your or your life must change so you can get what you want. Which means you likely struggle with reason #2 – Letting Go.

The reason why so few people every achieve success in one area of life (let alone in all areas) is because people can’t let go.

Think about the countless times during the day when you demand that something should be as you need or want it to be. This could be the times you get annoyed or angry or …. offended. Or maybe you are absolutely determined that what you are desperately wanting must happen exactly as you want it to. That is, you are using super glue to there only being one way the results you are after can happen.

How is your grip on life?

Are you clutching ruthlessly to your beliefs, values, principles, approach to life, your need to be highly emotional, always right (or maybe you are never right) and so on?

If you want to create positive change in your life, you will HAVE to learn how to let go.

You will have to release your grip on the shell that is you and your life right now and emerge (with shaky knees if need be) so that you can step out and rise up to a bigger and better you. (Your higher self.)

I want you to try a quick visualization technique.

Pretend you are hanging on for dear life to whatever it is you can’t let go of. This could be an outcome, a person, a thing, a job, a home, a situation, a goal etc. Somehow you’ve climbed way out on a tree limb and you are so focused on your grip clutching the tree branch that you won’t even look down.

Visualize taking a deep breath and just letting go. Literally let go of the branch you are hanging onto. I bet you are thinking, “I’m not letting go, I can’t even look down!”

Now think about it like this. You have a five year old who has decided to be brave and attempt to cross the monkey bars at a playground. They get halfway across and panic. They are clutching on for dear life and screaming for you to help them. The ground is only a foot away from their feet – your child will be just fine if they let go. They don’t need your help. So you try and coax them into letting go. If they trust you, they let go. If they don’t they panic more and start kicking around because that is what kids do. And then what happens? They lose their grip and drop that little ways to the ground and realize they are fine.

You are that kid that won’t let go but will be just fine when you finally do. Now return to visualizing you be out at the end of that tree branch again. At the very least, visualize looking down beneath your feet to see how far the ground really is. Take a deep breathe in and visualize letting go, and landing softly on your feet like a cat. Look up and see that the branch you were hanging on to is not that far off the ground and breathe a sigh of relief.

I wonder how long you were hanging onto that branch!

Every time that you can walk through this visualization, every time during the week that you find yourself receiving/emitting negative energy and you can pause and let go and release – you are decisively allowing yourself to rise up to a higher you.

And it gets easier every time you apply it.

Living an empowered life is a bit like surfing.

If you are sitting on the surfboard clutching the edges of the board as tightly as you can – you might make it to shore eventually – as the tides (life) will carry you there. But if you can find the courage to let go of the board, and stand up and relax – you will experience life in an entirely different and much more enjoyable way.

Take a few minutes and think about your life right now.

What are 5 things you’ve been hanging onto?

Grab a piece of paper and write those 5 things down. Things where if you could let go, you’d immediately feel a huge wave of relief.

We are learning we need to let go so we can grow and learned a somewhat silly (hey it works) technique for releasing the very parts of ourselves that have been holding us back.

We are realizing we’ve been gripping onto some things (maybe a lot of things) that are not good for us, are not us being authentic. We understand now that if we want to get up and over there to that bigger, happier, healthier more balanced life that is on purpose and fulfilling – we are going to have to let go of who we have been and who we were up until today.

If you are ready for growth and change – you’ve got to decide to put this old you into a box and close the lid. If you are not ready quite yet – just keep revisiting everything we’ve covered and keep thinking about the big questions I’ve been asking you.

You get to make this call. It is your decision. It’s time for the real you to emerge!

What are you willing to look at in your life and consider letting go of so that you can feel relief, joy and energized again?


I’m want to remind you that I have a workshop all about helping you figure out just what your purpose in life is, how to create a life that involves activities that create that good energy from within and how to line up your goals to build a life centered around your passions and purpose. If you are still teeter tottering about things – and aren’t really sure – this is a great program that will give you clarity.

You can learn more about the workshop here. 

Image © Dollar Photo Club

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