7 Tips for Keeping Yourself Together (When S* hits the fan)
How it happens greatly depends on how we decide to make life happen and also how we decide to respond to those unexpected situations. The truth is, if we were completely accountable and responsible in everything we do, these unexpected situations would rarely happen. However, this would mean we’d be perfect, and be able to plan, prepare and perform at 110% every second of every day. And we are not perfect no matter how much we’d like to be.
So what can we do to respond well when the S*t hits the fan? Use the 7 tips I’m sharing with you keep yourself together on really rough days and in times of crisis.
Keeping It Together Tip #1
First, take a deep breath. If you need to step outside for a few minutes, or close your eyes or listen to some music, do so.
The first step in doing anything is do it from a calm and quiet mind. Only when the mind is calm and quiet can we make good decisions.
Keeping It Together Tip #2
Remove yourself from the situation. Take a step back, look at the bigger picture and realize this is just one small, brief moment in time. There are others dealing with much more difficult and harsh problems. You can handle this.
You’ve likely dealt with more challenging moments, and if this one takes the cake, then reflect on how you handled prior rock bottom moments. Use your strengths – you are capable.
Keeping It Together Tip #3
Remove your emotions from the moment.
You can emotionally deal with the circumstances at another time, after you’ve made good decisions and made good effort to resolve the moment wisely. Your emotions will only derail you and cause you to not think as clearly as possible. So, set them aside before doing anything else.
Our emotions are actually a choice, they are the way in which express how we are interpreting life and how we describe the energy shifts we experience. Sometimes, the best thing to do is not feel – and after a little time has passed then you can work your way through a box of tissues or hit the punching bag.
When it comes to our feelings, remember you are only responsible for yours and no one else’s. Don’t let people badger you into feeling negativity or extreme emotions just because they can’t handle things well. With that, don’t feel guilty either for deciding to what degree you will feel about something.
Keeping It Together Tip #4
Put yourself in the Master’s shoes. That is, if you saw this situation in someone else’s life, what advice, wisdom, experience, encouragement would you give them? If this were your best friend, your child/parent, someone you know who normally handles things well, how would you show them a good way to deal with the issues at hand?
If you could dial a 1-800 Master Guru with a magic wand, what would the person on the other end tell you is the best way to handle this?
Try to approach your impossible situation with the insight of a wise old master.
Keeping It Together Tip #5
Take Action. Make a decision to the best of your ability right here and now. Action will do one of two things.
First, taking action prevents doubt, fear and worry from creeping in.
Second, it will either not fix the situation, which gives you knowledge and experience to go about making a different decision/action and bring you closer to fixing it, or it will fix things and the problem will be resolved.
*Be sure to see the tail end of the next tip for how to take action most wisely.
Keeping it Together Tip #6
Let things sit for a bit. I know I just told you to take action! However, the exception is if you have found yourself in this situation before and your experience and wisdom tells you to patiently wait. It is the “Let Muddied Water Stand and It Will Clear” concept.
Sometimes we don’t have to do a darn thing but pause and let life work itself out. Especially if it involves other people or things you really didn’t have much say about. (Trust me you have more power than you realize.)
This reverts back to Tip #1, we only want to take action if our mind is centered, calm and functioning clearly. Anything else will be actions creating more chaos and struggle.
Keeping it Together Tip #7
If you want something in life, you will have to get up and go get it.
Nobody owes us anything in life, nor do we owe anyone anything. Disappointment arrives when we hang onto misinterpretations of how life is to be but our misunderstandings don’t change the timeless, universal laws of life. If you want something, if you want anything in your life to be different, it is up to you to make the decisions and take the right actions to create change.
Adjust your approach to life (mindset and beliefs) and life will change before your eyes, without giving away your personal power or demanding others give you theirs. This lesson is coupled with that of accountability and ownership of one’s life. Own everything that you are and do – it makes a big difference!
Let’s quickly summarize our 7 tips for keeping it together when life isn’t nice – fall back plan.
- Take a big breath, pause and well, just breathe.
- Remove yourself from the moment, this issue is a tiny blip in your lifeline.
- Put your emotions about it and those involved in a box and open on a different day. Decision Making + Emotions = Bad Decisions
- Gather your intellect and wisdom. You’ve got this, the issue can only be as big as you allow it to be.
- Make a decision and take action.
- Re-center your mind and get yourself thinking clearly.
- Own it for what it is, put forth willingness to be the change creator in the situation.
Some other things to consider when life feels like it’s total chaos:
- Level up your approach. Your thoughts will determine the results. Think clearly, think positively and be as solution oriented as possible.
- Forget about others. When you are in crisis mode, you (and immediate family) ARE your #1 priority, and you need to decide and act in your best interest.
- Remember, you are responsible for you. Not for other’s decisions, actions, and results – or the lack there of.
- Time is always moving forward, life is always about change. Keep going forward and go with the flow. Stay focused on the solution and being flexible.
- Let go of resistance. Resistance is pent up negative energy that will eventually explode. Let go of fear and allow what you really want into your life. Try to just literally let go – read this post on how to do so.
We always have a choice. We can always be in control of our thoughts, decisions and actions. We determine our own outcome in life. With that being said, if it’s a rough day have an extra coffee with a big handful of M & M’s and give yourself a break. Have a skip day, find a good movie to watch, bury under a cozy blanket and hibernate for a bit until you have settled yourself down.
Everyone experiences high stress, tragedy, chaos and unfavorable circumstances from time to time. If you are reading this I bet you could use a heaping pile of encouragement, inspiration and additional tips to help you get through.
You can sign up below for 100 Days of Inspiration.
Image Adobe Stock